Friday, July 13, 2007

Resigned for the better

After only six weeks, it is sad to say that I have to resign from this job of mine.

I loved the job though. I get to:-

1) Wake up at random times everyday.

2) Meet up with whoever I want to meet during office hours.

3) Sleep whenever my heart desires.

4) Not worry about achieving targets.

5) Start work at 12am and finish around 3am.

6) Eat anything I want during office hours.

7) Not listen to any office politics.

8) Surf adult materials as part of my work.

9) Work with my birthday suit.

And the best of all:

10) Be My Own BOSS!

Muahaha....however, due to massive financial losses and without any single profit, I have to find another job that could keep me out of bankruptcy.

So starting Monday, I will begin a new role...a new life. Hopefully a better one than before.



P.S.: Vacancy available for the role of "Professional Bum". Please contact Ah_Mike for more details. Fresh grads are discouraged to apply.

6 comments:

Jasonmumbles said...

Wah, 1-2 weeks didn't visit, you quited your job and now finding another job.

Good luck!

Bryan said...

Sorry to hear about it man, hope you find something worthwhile to do.

Sir Bum a Lot said...

Dear Mr. AH Mike,

I am writing to apply for the Professional Bum position advertised in the Clouded Pawn blog. As requested, I am enclosing a completed job application, my certification, my resume and three references.

The opportunity presented in this listing is very interesting, and I believe that my strong non experience and education will make me a very competitive candidate for this position. The key strengths that I possess for success in this position include:

* I have no experience
* I strive for failure
* I provide exceptional contributions to customer service for all customers

With a BS degree in Computer Programming, I have a full understanding of the full life cycle of a doing nothing. I also have experience in sleeping and excelling at surfing for porn sites when needed.

Please see my resume for additional information on my experience.

I can be reached anytime via my cell phone, 555-555-5555. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to speaking with you about this employment opportunity.

Sincerely,
Sir Bum a Lot

Ah_Mike said...

Jasonmumbles, bryan: Actually guys, I found a job already and will start this Monday lol. I just stopped working as a professional bum that's all :)

Ah_Mike said...

Dear Sir Bum a Lot,

RE: APPOINTMENT AS BUM, PROFESSIONAL

I am pleased to offer you an appointment to the position of Bum, Professional under Job Grade 0. The terms and conditions of service are outlined as below:-

1) SALARY

Your basic salary will be RM0.00 per month. Sponsorships will be carried out based on your performance and is at the sole discretion of any one.

2) DATE OF COMMENCEMENT

Your employment shall commence on 16 July 2007 but if this date cannot be fulfilled, please set the new date yourself.

3) DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITES

You shall report to no one but your voices in your head.


4) PROBATION

You will be required to serve a probation period of six (6) minutes, which is extendible based on your performance. During this period, either party may terminate the service by giving the other party five (5) seconds notice in verbal.

5) RESIGNATION AND TERMINATION OF EMPLOYMENT

Upon confirmation of your service, termination of employment may be effected by either party by giving the other party five (5) seconds in verbal.

6) WORKING HOURS

The normal working hours are from 12.00am to 12.00am from Sundays to Sundays.

7) FRINGE BENEFITS

You are not eligible for any benefits.

Kindly indicate your acceptance of the foregoing by bringing your bed and pillows to the office. Meanwhile, we would like to take this opportunity in welcoming you to our dreams.

Thank you.

Yours faithfully,

Ah_Mike

YOMI said...

Walau eh... ah_mike
So much time to actually write a formal letter man!! Wow~!!! Hahaha!!! I want the PRO BUM job but I wish I would get paid for it. Hahaa!!! Eh wait.. that sounded wrong..

BUM + PAID = ..ahem..

BAD!! OK!! I TAKE THAT BACK!! NO NO, NO SELLING BUMS FOR ME!! HAHA!!